Mental strength isn’t usually reflected in what you do. It’s more often seen in what you don’t do. Self-pity is destructive and creates feelings of negativity. The goal is swap self-pity with gratitude.

Grit, resilience, mindfulness and an unwavering perseverance are considered to be the signature traits of mentally strong people. One other common trait that stands out among mentally strong people is immense willpower. In the face of adversity and testing situations, when it is too tempting to give up, they refuse to do so. Instead, they endure and hang on a little longer.

But is this something one has to be inherently born with or can it be acquired over time? Experts believe that although genetics and personality play a pivotal role, with experience, people can acquire varying degrees of mental strength. Although, there are certain things mentally strong people do that elevates their status from the rest.

Just like you exercise your body to gain strength and build endurance, your brain needs to be exercised to develop mental strength. This may mean performing tasks that stretch your mental endurance, and it starts with fighting (and winning) smaller battles. It could be as simple as taking cold shower bath if you always use hot water for shower, or taking the stairs to get instead of the elevators.

Mental strength isn’t usually reflected in what you do. It’s more often seen in what you don’t do.

Mental strength is about developing mental strength is a “three-pronged approach.” It’s about controlling your thoughts, behaviors, and emotions.

Below are the 12 things you should try if you want to be mentally strong:

1. Don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Self-pity is destructive and creates feelings of negativity. The goal is swap self-pity with gratitude.
2. Maintain a strong grip on your self power. Stand up for yourself. It’s important that you keep track of your goals and work toward them.
3. Don’t shy away from change.Change opens new opportunities. Making changes can be frightening, but shying away from them prevents growth and lets others pass you by.
4. Don’t focus on things you can’t control. Trying to be in control of everything is likely a response to anxiety. Instead, focus on what you can do.
5. Don’t worry about pleasing everyone. You will be stronger and more confident if you stop judging yourself by what you believe other people think of you.
6. Don’t spend time dwelling on the past. It doesn’t solve anything, and can lead to depression. Instead, enjoy the present and plan for the future.
7. Don’t make the same mistake over and over. Accept responsibility for the mistake and create a thoughtful, written plan to avoid the same mistake in the future.
8. Don’t resent other people’s success. Even if you become successful, you may never be content if you’re always focusing on others.
9. Don’t give up after the first failure. Success isn’t always immediate, and failure is almost always an obstacle you will have to overcome. Learn to bounce back.
10. Don’t fear spending time alone. Solitude can help you focus on growth by increasing productivity, empathy and creativity.
11. Don’t feel the world owes you anything. The key is to focus on your efforts, accept criticism, acknowledge your flaws, and don’t keep score.
12. Don’t expect immediate results. Relentlessly work towards your long-term goals, measure your progress, and look at the bigger picture.

Let’s make a decision to stay in our power from today!