I have a question for you. When was the last time you had some really good, uncomplicated fun? Not a lovely dinner where you spent half the evening discussing work, family responsibilities, or what needs to get done next. Not a vacation where you came back needing another vacation! I mean the kind of fun where you laughed so much your stomach hurt, did something silly without worrying how you looked, or completely lost track of time because you were enjoying yourself.

It’s interesting how, somewhere along the way, life can become terribly serious. We wake up thinking about what needs to get done, move through our responsibilities, deal with people and their moods, manage our own emotions, and go to bed with another mental list waiting for tomorrow. Even our relaxation becomes a project. We schedule our workouts, meditation, social time, and sometimes even our fun! And while there’s nothing wrong with being responsible (someone does have to pay those bills!), I wonder whether we’ve become so good at managing life that we’ve forgotten how to enjoy parts of it.

Have We Become a Little Too Grown-Up?
I sometimes watch children playing and wonder when we adults became so conscious of ourselves. A child can make a complete mess of a drawing and proudly announce that it’s a masterpiece. They can dance to a song they’ve never heard before, invent a ridiculous game, or laugh uncontrollably at something that makes absolutely no sense to anyone else. And then there’s us. We won’t dance because we’re not good dancers. We won’t sing because we don’t have a good voice. We won’t try something new because we might look foolish. Goodness, when did having fun become something we needed qualifications for?

There’s a wonderful little story in Antoine de Saint-Exupéry’s book The Little Prince that comes to mind. The narrator remembers drawing a boa constrictor that had swallowed an elephant. When he showed his drawing to the grown-ups, they thought it was a hat! Instead of seeing what his imagination had created, they saw only what was familiar to them. It’s such a simple story, but I think there’s something rather telling about it. As we grow older, we become very good at recognizing what’s practical, sensible, and realistic. But sometimes, in the process, we stop looking at the world with curiosity. And without realizing it, we begin putting all sorts of little restrictions on ourselves:

• “I’m too old for that.” We decide certain activities belong to younger people, even when we’d genuinely enjoy them.
• “What will people think?” We become so conscious of appearances that spontaneity starts feeling uncomfortable.
• “I don’t have time for such things.” Yet somehow, we find twenty minutes to scroll through our phones or worry about something that hasn’t even happened!
• “I should be doing something useful.” Even our free time comes with a little guilt attached.

Of course, adulthood brings responsibilities. But being responsible doesn’t mean every moment has to be serious. Sometimes we carry that seriousness into situations that really don’t deserve it. Someone cuts us off in traffic, and we’re still annoyed twenty minutes later. A family member makes an irritating comment, and we spend half the afternoon mentally preparing our response. We have an unexpected free hour, but instead of enjoying it, we start mentally reorganizing our to-do list. And before anyone thinks I’m suggesting we should laugh off every problem, absolutely not. Some things deserve our concern, our anger, and our attention. But does everything? Does the person who irritated us at breakfast really deserve to occupy our thoughts until dinner? Perhaps part of growing older is also learning which things deserve our seriousness, and which ones we can afford to laugh at, shrug off, or simply leave behind.

When Your Body Forgets How to Switch Off
Have you ever been on a holiday, sitting somewhere beautiful, and realized that your body is there but your mind is still at home dealing with unfinished business? You’re looking at the ocean, but thinking about an email. You’re having dinner with friends, but mentally reviewing tomorrow’s schedule. The opportunity to enjoy yourself is right in front of you, yet something inside you hasn’t quite settled.
When we’ve been under stress for a long time, our nervous system can become accustomed to staying alert. We may find ourselves scanning for problems, anticipating what could go wrong, or feeling restless when there’s nothing urgent to do. Our body doesn’t always switch into a relaxed state simply because we’ve finally found some free time. And this is where I think fun has a rather interesting role to play. We often approach stress by trying to become calmer, through meditation, breathing, yoga, or simply resting. All valuable practices. But sometimes what we need isn’t another quiet activity. Sometimes we need to laugh, move, play, or do something completely different from our usual routine.

Think about the last time you had a really good laugh with someone. Not a polite little chuckle, but the kind where you couldn’t even finish telling the story because you kept laughing. Remember how you felt afterward? Perhaps your shoulders had relaxed, your breathing felt easier, or whatever was bothering you seemed a little less overwhelming. Laughter isn’t a cure for stress, of course, but research suggests it can help reduce perceived stress and support our sense of well-being. Enjoyable social experiences can also strengthen feelings of connection and safety. In other words, sometimes the most useful thing we can do for ourselves isn’t to work harder at relaxing. It’s to give ourselves something genuinely enjoyable to experience. Imagine being able to say, without any guilt, “I think I need to go have some fun today.” And actually mean it!

Whatever Happened to That Playful Part of You?
Do you remember the things you loved doing when you were younger? Not necessarily when you were a little child, even as a teenager or young adult. Perhaps you loved dancing, dressing up, singing, playing games, exploring unfamiliar places, or doing something a little mischievous with your friends. Remember how easily a simple plan could turn into an adventure? You didn’t need a perfect setting or an elaborate itinerary. Sometimes all it took was good company, a little freedom, and the willingness to see where the day went.
And then life happened. We became busy, responsible, perhaps a little self-conscious. Some of those interests disappeared quietly, without us even noticing. Nobody sat us down one day and announced, “Right, you’re an adult now. No more silliness!” Yet somehow, we began behaving as though that was the rule. Psychiatrist Stuart Brown, who has spent decades studying play, describes it as an important part of human development and well-being, not merely something children do to pass the time. What I find particularly interesting is his idea that different people have different natural ways of playing.
For example, fun can look very different from one person to another:

• The Adventurer: Loves exploring unfamiliar places, trying something new, or taking an unexpected detour.
• The Creator: Enjoys painting, cooking, gardening, crafting, or experimenting without worrying about the outcome.
• The Playful Spirit: Loves dancing, singing, joking, being silly, and laughing with others.
• The Storyteller: Finds joy in sharing stories, conversations, humour, and imaginative experiences.
• The Quiet Explorer: Enjoys wandering through a bookstore, discovering music, observing nature, or following a little curiosity.

These are simply examples, not fixed personality types. Perhaps the question isn’t whether we’re having enough fun, but whether we’ve forgotten what fun actually looks like for us. We often speak about our inner child in terms of childhood wounds and emotional healing. But there’s another part of that child worth remembering. The curious one. The adventurous one. The one who could become excited about something small and didn’t need every experience to have a purpose.

There’s also a beautiful idea in yogic philosophy that fits here. The sacral chakra, Svadhisthana, is traditionally associated with creativity, pleasure, emotional flow, and our capacity to enjoy experiences. I like the reminder behind that symbolism. Life isn’t only about discipline, achievement, healing, and becoming better versions of ourselves. There’s room for pleasure, imagination, and play too. And perhaps that’s something we forget even in our spiritual practices. We can become so focused on healing, releasing, improving, and raising our awareness that the whole journey starts feeling like another job! But surely becoming more present should also help us enjoy being alive? Sometimes mindfulness is sitting quietly and observing your breath. And sometimes it’s being so absorbed in a wonderful conversation, a silly game, or your favourite music that you’re not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow at all. 

A Few Ways to Bring the Fun Back…
I don’t think we necessarily need more entertainment. We have plenty of that available at the touch of a button. What we may need is more participation, more spontaneity, and a little less concern about how everything is supposed to turn out. Here are a few ideas worth experimenting with.

• Permit Yourself to Be Ridiculous
  Choose something that makes you laugh at yourself in a good way. Maybe it’s singing karaoke even though you can’t carry a tune, trying a silly dance with your partner, or playing a game where you’re absolutely hopeless. The point isn’t to become more confident by mastering the activity. It’s to discover that you can enjoy yourself without being impressive. When was the last time you did something badly and had a wonderful time doing it? 
• Create a “No Purpose” Hour
  Set aside one hour every week where the only rule is that you don’t have to accomplish anything. No fitness targets, no learning objectives, no catching up on chores. You might browse a bookstore, experiment with colours, wander through a neighbourhood, or sit somewhere watching the world go by. If you catch yourself thinking, “I should really be doing something useful,” remind yourself that enjoyment doesn’t need to justify its existence. 
• Bring Back a Little Mischief
  I’m talking about harmless surprises and playful moments that break the predictability of everyday life. Leave a funny note for someone, organize a surprise picnic, challenge your partner to a ridiculous competition, or send a friend an old photograph that will make both of you laugh. Sometimes the best part of a day is something nobody planned. 
• Practise the Five-Minute Mood Shift
  The next time you find yourself replaying an irritating conversation, first acknowledge what’s bothering you. If there’s an issue to address, decide when you’ll deal with it. Then deliberately give yourself five minutes of something that changes the atmosphere. Put on a favourite song and move around, step outside, play with your pet, or call someone who makes you laugh. You’re not pretending the problem doesn’t exist. You’re reminding your mind that one unpleasant experience doesn’t have to become the theme of your entire day. And yes, sometimes you’ll still be annoyed afterward. That’s okay too! 
• Revisit Something You Loved Before You Became “Sensible.” Think back to a time when you did things simply because they excited you. Maybe you loved roller skating, dancing, playing badminton, dressing up for no reason, or spending an afternoon exploring somewhere new. Choose one activity and bring it back, even in a small way. Don’t ask whether you’re too old, too busy, or too out of practice. Ask whether it might be fun. 
• Let Someone Else Plan the Adventure
  Many of us are so accustomed to organizing everything that we end up managing our own enjoyment. Ask a friend, partner, or family member to plan a surprise outing within a comfortable budget and time frame. Your only job is to show up with an open mind. It could be a new café, a local event, a walk somewhere unfamiliar, or an activity you’d never have chosen yourself. Sometimes giving up a little control is exactly what makes an experience refreshing. 
• Change the Question You Ask at the End of the Day
  Most of us mentally review what we accomplished, what went wrong, and what still needs attention. For one week, try asking a different question before bed: “What made me smile today?” If nothing comes to mind, don’t judge yourself. Just become curious about what might make tomorrow a little lighter. You may begin noticing tiny moments you’d normally overlook: a funny conversation, a beautiful sunset, or something amusing your pet did. 
• Have a Fun Date With Yourself
  We often wait for someone else to be available before doing something enjoyable. Visit a place you’ve been curious about, go to a matinee, try a new activity, or spend an afternoon doing exactly what appeals to you. The only condition? Don’t turn it into an errand-running trip on the way home!

Before You Get Back to Your To-Do List…
I think we sometimes forget that life isn’t meant to be one long series of responsibilities with a little enjoyment squeezed into the gaps. There will always be something to worry about. Someone will occasionally irritate us. Plans will change, work will pile up, and some days will simply be difficult. That’s part of being human. But so is laughing, playing, exploring, being curious, and occasionally doing something completely unnecessary just because it makes us happy. And here’s something I’ve been thinking about. We often look back at the happiest moments of our lives and realize they weren’t necessarily the most expensive holidays, the biggest achievements, or the perfectly planned occasions. Sometimes they were the unexpected conversations, the ridiculous things we did with friends, the laughter around a dinner table, or the afternoons when nothing particularly important happened, except that we had a wonderful time. Those moments may seem small when they’re happening. But somehow, they have a way of staying with us.
Perhaps we don’t need to wait until life feels less complicated to enjoy it. We can be responsible without being rigid. We can care deeply about things without carrying every little frustration around all day. We can continue growing as people without turning ourselves into permanent improvement projects. And maybe, just maybe, we can stop treating fun as something we have to earn after everything else is finished. Because the truth is, the to-do list will probably still be there tomorrow. There will always be another email, another errand, another little problem demanding our attention. But that spontaneous invitation, that chance to laugh with someone you love, that unexpected beautiful afternoon? Those moments don’t always wait for us. So, the next time you feel like doing something silly, spontaneous, or completely unnecessary, perhaps don’t talk yourself out of it quite so quickly.
“Life has enough serious moments. Let’s not forget to enjoy the lighter ones”.
Love and light,
Manali